Monday, March 30, 2015

The Beauty of Spring & Life Updates

Spring must be the most favorite time of the year. In the past, I never looked and saw Spring the way I see now. The only difference that each season brings to me was simply the difference in temperature, that was all. Sadly it was such a poor outlook of a person who never really took the time to appreciate little things in life or the beauty that our mother nature offers. However, I was glad it didn't take me a lifetime to finally realize the small things in life. I love the beauty of Spring when everything is coming back to life after a long period of cold and dark days. Seeing those little and colorful flowers never fail to make me happy.

On another note, life has been crazy ever since last summer. Work related stress ate me up and consumed my energy for months. Last year was crazy to say at least. The possibility of losing a job plus the fear of having breast cancer were the worst combination of all, they were the two crazy things that happened right around the same time last year. Hence the reason of the absence from this space for the longest time.
Looking back now, I never wanted a year like that again. The worst part of all was the wait. The wait to hear about the decision at work. The wait to hear the biopsy result. The wait was killing me! I remember coming home everyday feeling exhausted physically and emotionally. I felt all tensed from head to toe every single day due to stress from work. One night the fear of having cancer hit me hard, I was sitting right next to my daughter's bed watching her sleep at night. My tears were rolling down my eyes. I couldn't help but thought about all kind of things that could happen if those white spots they saw in the mammogram turned out to be cancer. I let my imagination ran wild. I worried about my daughter's life most. I didn't want to die, she still needed me at this age I thought. It was awful.
Finally by September, the dark clouds finally started to move away and the sky slowly cleared up. Three people in the same department were let go and the other three (me included) were safe. It was very emotional seeing the coworkers you had worked with for 10 years go. Those that stay carry triple workloads, it was not fun but we are grateful that we still have jobs. It is quite a blessing these days. Next the result I had been waiting for weeks finally arrived, no cancer. NO CANCER..NO CANCER...I happily repeated with joy and relief. I could never been anymore grateful to be healthy right now. 
Despite the stressful situations I had gone through, I realized that you only made everything worse by worrying yourself to death. Whatever happens, happens. There is no point in worrying too much about things that haven't come (which is difficult for me to do because I can worry about anything you can imagine). I always say that I believe everything in life happens for a reason. I believe those two incidents were great reminders that life is unexpected and too short. Don't take things for granted. 
Live now, enjoy life now, share with others now, love now, appreciate now and worry less.
Thank you Kim, Rowena, Jane@Another Momma Blog, Trishie, Jane@Winding Ridge Lane, Jo, Louise and Diva in Me for visiting this blog and/or keeping me company on Instagram during the hiatus period. Hope to be back soon. Miss reading all your posts.
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  1. A health scare like that especially when it comes to the big "C" is especially scary since you have such a young daughter. I'm just so relieved for you and your family that it turned out to be nothing more than a scare Nelah! I'm also glad to hear you still have your job as well. I can imagine what a frightening and stressful time it must've been for you. I would sometimes let my mind wander after getting MRI's and basically make myself crazy and I have a feeling you did the same. We don't have much in life if we don't have our health so just continue to keep taking care of yourself and don't let work take a toll on you either. It's good that this put everything including Spring in a new perspective for you! May you enjoy the flowers and light that much more now and thanks for sharing these pretties with us.

  2. Hi Nelah, I am so glad to hear you pulled through okay. I can't imagine how stressful and frightening the past year must have been. It looks like spring has arrived in your area - hope you have a chance to enjoy the beautiful weather and the flowers. Big hugs, and all the best to you and your family!

  3. I'm so glad to hear that you're ok. I went through something similar several years ago, and afterwards, I just felt numb. I gained a new perspective regarding life, family, and little things in between. The idea that life is so fleeting and how one event could alter the rest of yours and your love ones' lives so dramatically still hits me like a ton of bricks when I think about it. It makes you hug your love ones a little longer and cherish every moment no matter how mundane it may seem at the time.
    Your photos of Spring is simply breathtaking. Have a wonderful Easter weekend!

  4. Oh my goodness Nelah. I am so sorry you had to go through such stressful times but it sounds like you are much stronger and brighter. Hoping all is well now and sending you greener and happier thoughts! xx

  5. Nelah, I had the same tunnel vision you had. Seasons would come and seasons would go without much thought. Now I HEAR the birds tweeting. I SEE the grass filling out and flowers blooming. Life is all around us. We just have to take notice.You have been through so much. God Bless You. I can only imagine as a young mother, how you felt. I would've been worried too. I'm so glad you don't have cancer. What a relief! I'm so glad you have your job. Companies are downsizing so, it's drastic. Many good people are still let go because they can't afford them. It's very unfortunate. I'm glad things have turned around for you and happy we are blog friends.


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