Friday, April 11, 2014

I started blogging because.....

Every single one of us blogs for a different reason: to improve writing skills, to talk about their passion/obsession, to document their lives,  to share photography,  to reduce stress from work/personal life, to find a new hobby, to connect with other people who share the same interest and etc. As I wrote this post, I paused a minute and thought about an initial reason why I started blogging.

Almost 4 years ago on 6/19/2010, I first set my footsteps in Blogsphere in an attempt to "find myself again". As silly as it may sound,  how could one forget about herself?  I almost did after entering the wonder world of motherhood. I felt my world turned upside down when I became the first time mother in 2009. Every day of my life was not the same since then. It was much sweeter yet bitter and difficult too. I set very high expectations on myself the minutes I found out I was pregnant that I must be the best mother/wife I could be. Silly me I set myself up for stresses and frustrations.

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Before I started blogging I had no clue this little space on the internet even existed. Everyday my life was evolved around a baby, a long list of chores, a full time job, a husband who had erratic work schedules, a dirty house and more. I didn't remember watching TV that much or surfing an Internet. Instead, i was scrubbing a toilet at night after a long day at work and a baby was in her crib (and the husband at work). I rarely went shopping anymore. I completely stopped playing with makeup too. If i showed you a picture of myself from those days, you may just assume i have some plastic surgeries done. Boy i looked horrible from head to kidding. Despite my husband kept telling me I should  allow myself to a "me" time, I always refused. How could I ignore a dirty house to go out shopping??? (I was a perfectionist back then my house was always in a clean and organized state). No luxurious moments like that for me I must keep the house clean, take care of a baby and cook homemade meals. Those were my missions to become a dedicated mother.

I lived like that for 15 months straight when I mentally had enough of that dedicated/mother of the year lifestyle. I went through many bouts of emotional meltdown day in day out. I cried and whined almost on a daily basis. I was not happy. I couldn't find a balance. Those never ending chores. I had less time in a day to do everything. I could no longer maintain my sanity. I got upset easily. More alarmingly,  I didn't even remember all the fun things I used to do prior to becoming a mother.  I honestly didn't.

One day I stumbled upon a blog of a girl who blogged about makeup. As I started reading her blog, it reminded me of something I used to do like applying makeup and beautifying myself. It was like an eye opening. I discovered a small history of myself! This was something I used to do but decided not to continue in an mission to become a perfect mom but you know what? It was a bad idea. It was not a perfect mom who made a happy family.

It took a happy mom to raise a happy baby and make a happy family! Obviously I was not that mom. I was a mom who constantly thought about chores and how to get them done. I was a mom who was stressed herself to death. I was overtired, cranky and moody. For what? What good come out of all this? I may die from developing a heart disease before someone crowns me with the "Best Mother of The Year" award. Something MUST change immediately.

I started using blog as a tool to help me find things that I enjoyed doing prior to become a mother as well as discovering new and exciting things. Before that I always thought I never had the time but a reality is I had the time but didn't make some time for myself.

I must say blogging has helped me a LOT. Not to mention the amazing blogger friends who have continued to connect and stay with me through this journey. These blogger friends make a huge difference in my life everyday (you know who you are - thank you and big hug).

Blogging also helps me want to improve my look. The way I apply my makeup,  the way I learn to experiment with style through mistakes and much more.

My love for photography has blossomed from blogging too. Never once thought I would love taking photos this much.

I also learn to manage my time differently now. I too realize it is important to lower one's expectations in a certain situations. It is okay to not always have an over the top clean & organized house. It is okay if kitchen sinks are full with dirty dishes on occasion. It is okay to not clean the bathroom but sit and relax. It is okay to have some time to myself. It really is okay because this is the real life. Nothing is perfect. There will always be challenges.

Do you remember the real reason that got you started?


  1. this is so refreshing to hear. i think sometimes blogging brings out insecurities or jealousy because people get envious, but i loved how you connected with people and it reminded you of things you loved. i started blogging to find a community that i found on instagram. i started there first and connected with so many people who had so much advice and tips to share. i wanted to find something similar in the blogging world. i had blogged before but i didn't connect with anyone.. this time has been so different. i love being connected to so many different people who blog about so many different things. :)

  2. Oh Maysa, the tale of your pre-blogging life sounds sad. My Mum has had bouts like this and I think they are so difficult to overcome because you just keep digging yourself deeper and deeper into the ground. I'm so glad you found blogging and realised a clean house is not necessarily a happy house, an organised house is not necessarily a happy house, and a well-managed house is not necessarily a happy house. That must have been such a hard period of time for you and I am glad you are out of it now. I hope life continues as happily as it is doing right now for you in the coming future. I started blogging because I was having a similar crisis myself. I found that, though I am not very good at writing, I do enjoy that and tapping away at my keyboard soothes me. Then when my little piece is published and I see it on my blog, I feel a little joy inside of me which is my inner perfectionist saying 'YES!' My healing used to be walking the dog. Sometimes I would spend hours walking around outside to clear my head and get some space. Unfortunately, my dog left my life and I suddenly didn't know how to cope with a situation. I didn't feel like I could walk outside without a lead in my hand just roaming the streets - crazy lady much? I do have another dog now, but now another bombshell has hit my world and I am having to deal with that. This is when I discovered blogging and found that I love writing much more than I thought (I only ever wrote essays) and I love interacting with fellow bloggers such as yourself, especially when I can relate to them as I can to you right now.

    I'm so glad you found blogging as a way to escape and rediscover yourself, making for a happier you. I will be keeping up to date with you so hopefully we have a successful and happy blogging journey together. Rosemary x

  3. Loved this Nelah! I started blogging, because the people where I live do the same things over and over again (mardi gras, jazz fest, festivals etc.). That's great, but there's so much more to life! However, they don't divert from that same pattern. I was looking to connect with people that traveled to or lived in Europe, Asia or Australia. What are they wearing? What beauty products do they use? I get tired of the same stuff over and over again. I wanted to hear about NEW things. NEW adventures. I'm always looking out for something or someone who is unique. The first blogger I found was Cee of Coco & Vera from Canada. I was like WOW! Blogging has gotten me back into understanding fashion and beauty. It gets me OUT the house to showcase my lovely city. It introduces me to NEW things! I learn something everyday. I also get to try free products. I'm not here to sell anyone anything. I'm here to tell you if it's good or not. HAHAHA A lot of people misconstrue that about my blog. You are on track girl. We've all had our bumps. I was so depressed when I first started blogging. I was disappointed in the people I knew and they didn't believe in GROWTH. The guy I was dating said to go to London would be BORING. He said New Yorkers were stupid. I cut his ass loose. I wouldn't get anywhere with him. I need someone that is as progressive as me. LOL

  4. I really enjoyed reading about your journey to blogging! And it's great that it's something you do for yourself that has led you to rediscover yourself and the things that you enjoy. I started blogging at first to support my Etsy shop but then it kind of grew into it's own thing. I've always enjoyed writing and sharing inspirations with others so blogging has become an extension of that. I really like learning from other bloggers and the sense of community that you can build. When I was sick, I appreciated all the support I received and that helped me to fight on and feel less alone. The connections you make are the best part of blogging as far as I'm concerned and I'm really glad we connected through this realm Nelah!

    Rowena @ rolala loves

  5. What a thoughtful post! Thanks for sharing your journey. I originally started blogging many years ago simply to connect with my friends regarding purses and shoes, lol! Then, I stopped suddenly because we had a death in the family, and I just needed some time to myself. I started blogging again recently because of my insomnia, and I miss connecting with some old friends.

  6. Oh thanks for share your experience sweetie, it´s very inspiring and gorgeous how your blog has helped in your life~
    I started to blogging because I lvoe it write, share and take photographs but that is another story, thanks for share your experience on your blog~
    Now I´m following you GFC #38 I want invite you to my blog and if you want follow me back~
    Comment to me back, to keep in touch~

  7. I have taken such an interest in make up lately it is seriously freaking out my bank balance, and my Mum's bank balance, and my Dad's bank balance… My grandparents are coming over tomorrow so… But I am really interested in skincare and I think it is more important! Skincare is the foundation to make up so unless that is sorted, the make up won't look as great. Anyway, you should try and get yourself back into make up if it is something you are missing…you might discover some new brands that become your faves.

    Thanks for thanking me haha. I have just seen Kim's comment and your name is Nelah, not Maysa? I'm sorry, how naive of me to assume your name was Maysa just because your blog is Maysa and Sunshine. I just uploaded a post and unfortunately made the same mistake. I mentioned your blog on it because your comment on my snail extract review gave me the inspiration to create the post. You should check it out if you have the time. Thanks for the tip-off. Rosemary x

  8. Such a wonderful story! And yes, I do remember my reasons, too. Partially, because I needed my sport to talk about fashion, but also because I needed to find the happy me again, after an accident. So here I am, three years on and still blogging. :)

  9. I enjoyed this post a lot. It sounds as if you're sitting in front of us, talking to us. I could hear your voice in there. I'm glad that you've pulled yourself out from that emotional rut and how blogging had helped you to become who you are now. You are still the perfect mom and wife to me though I really hate to use the word "perfect" coz nobody is but you know, you're really talented in many things and you should give yourself a pat on the back.

    I started blogging in 2004 after I graduated coz many of my friends were egging me to start a blog since I love to recount stories. How I progressed up till now, I think you've read on my blog intro page before. I'm so glad to meet so many lovely people and one of them is YOU!

  10. Nelah! I am glad to read your honest story and purpose of starting a blog! I made few blogs before but with a different purpose, then one winter day, I realized I had no where else to really express my feelings and emotions, all my life I've been hiding the things that affected me and now I was too scared to tell my friends anything serious, I always had something I wanted to tell, but I kept it secret. I created my current blog to write down my stories, even if it's vague and something real-world me can't ever express. I wanted to talk to other bloggers with a belief that they won't judge me for trying to be me, not a fake happy self. but this decision, made me so much happier than I've imagined, I'm still learning to express, but I'm learning it through reading other sincere blog posts and I feel so much warmth at times like this post for example. so thank you Nelah, for learning new things and for making me learn through you. Your process of finding yourself makes me find myself too.


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